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Eve Tahmincioglu

Primary author Eve Tahmincioglu has been covering small business and entrepreneurship for more than a decade. She regularly writes about small business issues for the New York Times and BusinessWeek's SmallBiz magazine. She also writes the Your Career column for MSNBC.com. She is the author of "From the Sandbox to the Corner Office."



E-mail made me stupid

Posted: Tuesday, August 14, 2007 9:14 AM by Eve Tahmincioglu
Filed Under: , , , ,

A self-employed colleague of mine recently called me on the telephone. Can you stand it? I felt so honored that she actually put down her PDA to pick up the phone and call. Usually she interacts with the world outside via e-mail, as I do.
 
She made a point of telling me at the beginning of our conversation: “I rarely call anyone on the phone.”
 
Her pronouncement implied that she considered me sort of special to abandon her regular e-mail routine. I felt a lot of pressure to make the phone call great for her. I’m not sure I succeeded, having been out of practice myself for a while.
 
Call me a technoramus.
 

V-MODA Intros Dual-Purpose Headphone/Headset for Apple iPhone
Business Wire

There’s something about old-fashioned tools that just make us better people, better communicators. We think nothing about quickly writing an uninspiring e-mail with little panache and lots of typos, but in a phone conversation you have to try and be witty, engaging. An instant message is barely English these days, but in a lunch meeting with a colleague or customer you have to be articulate and not look like a slob.
 
Small businesses of all types are spending too much time sending e-mails in lieu of real, thoughtful conversation. More than 50 percent of small business owners now spend about one to two hours reading or writing e-mail on a daily basis, according to a recent survey by payroll company SurePayroll. The study found that 62 percent of small business owners believe e-mail is equally effective as or more effective than in-person or phone communication.
 
It’s gotten worse thanks to cell phones and PDAs with Internet access. E-gadgets are causing us to abandon the humanness within. They're like technological body snatchers.
 
I really believe my new iPhone has made me look like a zombie to colleagues, friends and family. I’m on the stupid thing 24-7, checking e-mail while in the car or while watching "Hells Kitchen" Monday nights. I’d never think to call an editor or source after 6 p.m. on the telephone, but e-mails sent at 2 a.m. via my trusty iPhone? Why not?
I recently asked Susan Wilson Solovic, CEO of the Small Business Television Network, if she thought we’re all going mad. She assured me we weren’t but had words of caution: “It is easy for clients and customers to misinterpret e-mails because they can’t hear the tone of your voice.  As a result, unanticipated problems may arise. So for any types of messages that may elicit an emotional response, it’s best to use the phone, minimizing the risk of misunderstandings.”

Full disclosure here: I e-mailed her my question. So, feeling like a techno-hypocrite, I forced myself to pick up the phone.

Ring, ring, ring.

“Hello, this is Susan.”

“Hello, this is Eve.”

“Have we all gone mad?” I ask again, but this time using my vocal cords.

“No,” Solovic responds. “Since many small business owners work odd hours, e-mail is an easy way to get things done.”

But, she adds, “many small business owners hide behind e-mail.” They don’t have time or the desire to get into a confrontation with a client or customer. “With e-mail they don’t have to experience the emotion.”

Unfortunately, no pain often means no gain.

So get on the phone and resolve the dispute or issue ASAP. Say, “Let’s talk,” suggests Solovic. “It’s amazing when you get someone on the phone and hear their voice. It’s easier to resolve conflict.”

“Thanks,” I say. “Got to run. I’ll e-mail later.”

How do you prefer to do business, by phone, e-mail or in person?

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Comments

As the "self-employed colleague" referred to in the first sentence, I'll chime in. I send and receive so many emails each day that I have realized that if you want to have a more meaningful connection, it's really nice to pick up the phone. Thus, my phoning Eve. Granted, if everyone did this all day, we'd have no time to get to all our work (i.e. all those emails). But I'm making an effort to decide when a relationship could benefit from a little voice contact from time to time.
Not only does email make me stupid, but having a cell phone makes me stupid too. I don't know anyone's number by heart now. If I lost my cell phone, where all my friends' #s are programmed in, I wouldn't know how to reach them again...well, I guess I'd have to email them to have them email me their #. Ha ha ha.

I'm all for technology and modernization and convenience but there doesn't seem to be a limit these days. I'm on a computer all day at work, and the minute I get home from work, what do I do? Turn my home computer on to check my email again. Sounds silly but I bet everyone else does that too.

Who's not guilty of emailing a co-worker who sits 2 cubes away??
I do use email too much, but I also have a hearing problem so it helps to have everything in writing.  What does drive me nuts is when my daughter will text me instead of picking up and calling me.
Not only does e-mail make people stupid, but so does have a web site.  Nothing pi**es me off more than to ask someone a question and to be told to go to their web site for the answer.  A candidate for mayor did this to me and lost my vote forever.  
Not only are emails and cell phones making us stupid, it is making us dangerous. We would take a walk or a drive in the car to get away for a little while, now we take the phone and emails with usand many of us seem to believe that the car is the main place to use the phone. I wonder if there is any hope left
A couple of years ago someone said email has taken personal interaction out of the work place and people are losing those "people skills".  Is it true?  Just walk into an office and try to talk to someone.  Maybe you will be lucky enough for someone to look away from their computer and acknowledge that you are there.  Reserve the email for people you cannot talk to and need to get a message to.
As a teacher of the youth of our society, it is disheartening to grade papers and see cuz, "ur" or the other text message shortcuts in an essay that is supposed to have educational merit. The big problems in writing have went from learning the difference between there, their and they're to learning the actual spelling of whole words.  The same phenomenon happened with email and "snailmail".  It means something special to receive a letter or card in the mail.  Now, we cannot communicate without using abc(2) def(3) ghi(4). . . So, my next question is, when will I quit lecturing in class and just present at home internet lessons on laptop computers?  Our level of social skills will be reduced to how many words per minute one can type (or thumb out in text messaging's case)
I have grown to really despise email in the past few years. I've been using the internet and email for 10+ years, but lately it has become a very unwieldy chore and not necessarily the high-tech convenience that some would think it is. I would much rather, and often do, pick up the phone and make a call when I need results. Too often, the gist of what needs to be done gets lost in lengthy email conversations, especially with regards to situations that require the thought, opinions, and insight of more than two persons.

In my office there is a computer and email for every person, and yes it is certainly not uncommon to see emails sent back and forth between desks that are within talking distance, or just down the hallway. Some of my co-workers are very fond of opening an email, glancing at it, forwarding it to someone else, kicking their feet back on the desk, and saying "My job's done, not my problem now." The worst case scenarios are the countless forwards, replies, and cc's, with or without attachments, that make it to some receipients, many of whom have no business being involved with the situation. By the time the email has circulated around the office 4 or 5 times, which can sometimes take several days, the point of the conversation has become lost. Most of these circumstances could have been resolved in a matter of minutes with a phone call or face-to-face meeting.

Email works great for send detailed information, such as the specifics of a proposal or a purchase order. But for trying to resolve problems, forget it. When I receive an email that has already been forwarded and cc'd several times to half a dozen people, I'd much prefer to pick up the phone or go over to someone's office, resolve the situation, and put an end to the email tag game.
Calling on the phone is the only way to communicate.
Only e-mail if phone contact isn't possible.It's TOO EASY to missintuperate an e-mail. The only time I ussually get an e-mail from a client is to cancel services.
But what do we do with the people who let their phone calls go to voice mail because they are too busy answering/checking their email!?!?!?!  ........I have more than one business associate that will not answer their phone or respond to a voice mail message but will quickly (if not instantly) respond to an email.
For me, email keeps a record of what is said and when.  I am a better writer than a speaker, so it works best for me.  The emotional email is better on the phone.  I agree with you there.  I've gotten severely reprimandedby by bosses more than once for a misunderstanding of my intent in an email.  They came across as arrogant, condescending and confrontational.....none of which are in my nature to be.
I'm self-employed, and since my business is computer-based, I'm on the computer the majority of my work day. I agree, email is completely tone-deaf - if there's something you remotely think could be read into, you're better off picking up the phone. Otherwise, email's fantastic for 2am eureka moments, or if you are a night owl working.
I prefer e-mail -- I think it's a "cat-person/dog-person" type of thing. Although I cover more ground on the phone, I find that the "to do"s at the end of a call are much less clear than through e-mail.

The one think I hate with my e-mail though is the way my in-box is filled with stuff that I'm only a CC on. I haven't found a way to automate this yet into two mailboxes (except through a mail rule which doesn't always work) but if I could, my in-box would be a lot less harrowing. Right now, I average about 50 incoming e-mails a day, of which only 10 or so I actually need to do anything about. Oh well.
My oldest daughter thinks it's ridiculous that my wife and I have instant-messaged each other from different rooms of the house. Maybe it is.

On the other hand, I somehow set the field behind the house on fire with the lawnmower a few days ago. It was extremely handy to hold down "2" on my cell phone to call inside the house for help while running to the garage for firefighting implements.
who said that emotions are more in voices than written words .. it depends mainly on the response and state of the one recieving the message if it is written or be told
Having the resource to email and pick up the phone and call is great. We shouldn't hound others for choosing one or the other.
...and at the end of this article is the always-there "email this" link.  Ah, the irony.
As CEO of a start up company, I imposed a no email rule with the rest of the partners and employees. We started doing this as an experiment; we have not looked back! We do send emails but very sterile word usage such as " meeting reminder at..."
In the past company that I worked for, emails caused nothing but trouble and back-log. People tend to misread/ misinterpret emails and a follow up phone call is usually made to clarify. So very little was gained. That company failed because the team did not behave like a team but rather as a cluster of independents.
As a hearing impaired person, I thank God for email!!  It helps me communicate with others.  I can talk on the phone, but I am apt to either not hear the whole conversation, or, even worse, misunderstand the words being said.  Since I have become hearing impaired, in my mid 40's, I have come to rely on technology more than ever. I don't IM, and use my cell phone in speaker mode almost exclusively.  Most of my coworkers understand my preference for email and respect my wishes in either emailing me, asking me to come see them, or coming to see me.As a hearing impaired person, I thank God for email!!  It helps me communicate with others.  I can talk on the phone, but I am apt to either not hear the whole conversation, or, even worse, misunderstand the words being said.  Since I have become hearing impaired, in my mid 40's, I have come to rely on technology more than ever. I don't IM, and use my cell phone in speaker mode almost exclusively.  Most of my coworkders understand my preference for email and respect my wishes in either emailing me, asking me to come see them, or coming to see me.
While email messages can be misinterpreted, one of their beneficial functions is that it is a written record of a 'conversation', which can be helpful in this litigious society.
Wow, those who are anti-email must work for great places.

I use email for proof.  My company is ridiculously understaffed.  While everyone is generally pretty pleasant, things often do not get done; especially on behalf of my department, which is the only offsite.

I found early one that the easiest defense for people who drop the ball is to say that they didn't know.  Which was making me look incompetent.  

So now I always email.  In fact, even if I call for a quick answer, I still email an "As per our conversation."

And for those who tend to drop the ball more often than others (or who maliciously drop the ball - there are a few), I cc myself on the email.  It is my hope that this sends a message to them saying, "Notice me cc'ing myself.  Rest assured that should you even THINK about ignoring this, this email will be produced."

Needless to say, I'm trying desparately to escape!
When you write to someone, whether by email or letter (and I don't understand why people think there's a difference; writing is writing) you can take your time and express yourself the way you want.  Also, in business communication, an email (again, like a letter) is written documentation and preserves a record of what was said.  Telephone conversations cannot be preserved -- if you need a written record, you have to follow up the conversation with a letter, and where's the sense in saying the same thing twice?  

I also don't understand why so many people say it is easy to misinterpret the tone of an email.  Why can you misinterpret an email and not a letter?  Tone of voice can be misinterpreted as well, especially without the additional clue of a facial expression.  If your emails are being misinterpreted, take your time and compose them as you would a letter.  You can do that with email.  In a phone conversation you have to come up with a reply on the spot and you might say the wrong thing.  

Finally, the greatest drawback to calling someone on the telephone is that you can't know whether your call will be convenient for them.  People telephone me when I'm preparing dinner, eating (and no, I'm not talking about telemarketers) or otherwise busy because they "didn't want to send an email."  With email, I can read and answer the communication at MY convenience.  I have time to deal with any emotional reactions I might have to the message (and emotional reactions make people do stupid things) and consider my reply.  
Although convenient, there are times when one should pick up the phone.  Case in point....death notification of a cousin.  That one really hurt.
The really insidious part about both email and cell phones is how they have taken away from life outside of work. As a sales professional for the past 25 years I have used both from the beginning. What I have discovered, and grown to hate, is how they take over your life. How many times have you checked work-related emails, or answered your cell phone for a work related call after you've left the office for the day? How many vacations have you taken where you have to take your laptop to check emails (and answer them) while your family is doing something else without you?
It used to be, when you left the office you left your inbox and your office phone as well. Nowadays, it seems, more and more bosses expect you to check emails and answer your cell phone outside of normal business hours. Technology was supposed to lessen our workload, not increase it.
The answer to the problem is to treat everything with moderation and common sense. Know what the upside and downside of using email is and conduct your communication accordingly. Don't swear by it or damn it, it is only how it is used or misused that cause problems.
It's amazing how this culture of instant gratification and nanosecond attention spans has slowly started to erode the english language.  I'll use an example from my wife who is a sixth grade teacher.  During a recent parent-teacher conference, the parent was incensed that his son was failing english.  His argument?  We live in a world of spell checkers making the need to teach writing skills unnecessary.  I would love to see him write a coherent sentence.
Email can be wonderful, but it can also be the most frustrating communication method available.  I find it easy to lay out specific questions to someone over email in a readable manner that allows me to separate different issues and elicit a response to each problem or question.  

What does NOT work is when people read the first question or two and then proceed to answer only that, ignoring the rest of the email.  What follows is a series of, "But what about...?" emails, and sometimes people even then pick one more question, ignoring a third or fourth!

Since reading comprehension is a skill not shared by all, email will always have significant pitfalls.  Since listening comprehension is also a skill not shared by all, phone conversations can be a problem.  Since people don't like to move their butts out of their cubes, face to face meetings can be an issue.  What's the solution?  If you find that, you'll rival Bill Gates' fortune.
As a teacher of young people it is commendable of SD Port Orange FL to be concerned about spelling in school essays then he/she goes on to say "The big problems in writing have went --- WENT! WENT! Shouldn't he/she have said " The big problems in writing have gone -----. Grammar is also as important as spelling and this from a teacher of Youth! I despair of the quality of English teaching in this Country
It is most annoying when trying to reach a communcation company by phone, such as ATT or T-Mobile and you are directed to their web site.  If I could get the answers, why would I be calling?

Now, please don't take away my blackberry.......
Unfortunately, it is the sign of the times.  As an engineer I use email as the primary tool for communications with colleagues and clients.  It serves as proof and confirms the transfer of information by tracking and affirmation of receipt of same.  When using the telephone, some incompetents try to deny a conversation ever took place.  Emails are an important way of reaching many with one hit of the send key.  Drawbacks are when you made a mistake and cannot withdraw what you just sent.  I hold most globally sent emails for a day before sending them to avoid mistakes.  The next day I read it and some things not previously caught can be plainly corrected before sending.  There are some managers that even with an informative email they still don't get the crux of the message.  Thats when a meeting is scheduled and the first thing on the agenda is what do we order for grub. LOL...
I' so glad to find out I'm not the only person who prefers to do most business communication by email.  Email cuts the "crap" out of a conversation, you know, all the salutation stuff like, "How is your mom doing these days" and "I heard you are having great weather up there right now."  The stuff that seems to be the prelude to every business conversation.  I just don't have the time to chit-chat with everyone I must communicate with everyday.

And email leaves a record of what was said and who said it, which is important in these days of corporate blaming, finger-pointing and denials.  A phone call gives you none of that kind of paper-trail or security.

Life is different today that it was 20 years ago. No one has time for phone calls, phone calls lead to voice-mail tag, phone calls don't record the process of decision-making that maybe needed in the future.  There's one guy I've been telephone-tagging for three weeks because he's an oler guy that doesn't like email.  It would seem to me that anyone too old for email should probably retire instead of holding up projects through stubborn resistence to technology.  This isn't 1980 anymore, why refuse to use techonology created since then?
I'm a very phone-shy person, but limited technology available to me forces me to use a phone most of the time.  When I do use email, though, I find smilies and 'LOL' are at least a bit effective at showing my emotions.  They may be annoying, especially since I use them a little too much, but it works for me.  I can actually communicate much better by email than by phone, because I'm a halting talker (not quite a stutterer but a mumbler and always trying to find the right words).  But I can type without spelling or punctuation mistakes at 70wpm.  Now if I only had a computer that won't kick me off in the middle of an email (I need broadband), or a text phone, I'd be in seventh heaven.  
I agree email and fax communication is best for any conversation you want to be able to produce a record of subsequently. Also, I work in a laboratory where most people are not at a desk most of the day, so phoning just leads to voicemail. Might as well email.

If it's something that just can't wait, a phone call might be best. (We can page someone at our building, though we try to do so sparingly.) Also, cancelling evening plans via email is uncool. I have been stood up by people who emailed me a cancellation at 7 PM. By 7PM I am getting dressed to go, not checking email! Just call me!

Also, I would not use emoticons or abbreviations such as (especially) LOL in business email. It makes one look childish and silly.
Stop your whining, people...good grief.
The phone does not seem to make much difference, if the other party just ignores the voice message I left. And that, from my family. Can't tell you the rest of the meanness I have seen from others not related. What a world we have created. You can have her.
I use email and IM all the time--email is one of the primary ways my wife and I stay in touch during the day.  I still use the phone with her, to convey with my voice my desire to be with her, or to let her know I'm hoping she really has a great day, but otherwise, I really dislike the phone.  Most people tend to ramble and rarely get to the point, making what could be brief exchanges drag out into hours of pointless tangents and odd silences.

There are still times to use the phone, however: when it is clear that the reader of my email message did not perceive my meaning, when tensions start to rise, or when you know the other individual just hates email (especially if it is someone above you in the organization).  Even then, rather than using the phone, if I can't email/IM, I'd rather meet someone for coffee.  That way, at least we both can get a little break.

As to the folks who claim email is not expressive, I'll dare say it is simply that you are either not well practiced in using the tools, or your language skills could use a fine-tuning.  Why is it that people can perceive tone from a letter, but yet they claim they cannot from an email message? Just as in conversation, our word choice and syntax convey volumes of meaning.  As in letter writing, word choice, punctuation, and syntax convey meaning.  I'll agree that those who write solely in IM shorthand make things challenging for many (not to mention that they do not present the type of professional image most businesses yet desire--based on an older, more formal model), but those who actually take the time to compose email messages can convey much meaning, while avoiding a lot of fluff.

Perhaps the problem is not in the medium, but in the lack of preparation.
As with most things in life, moderation is the key.  I prefer to do a lot of my communication via email, but there are times when a phone is better, and still other times when face to face is even better than phone.  There is little that irritates me more than to be working intently on something only to be interrupted by a phone call (most of the time it will go to voice mail).  An email is much more likely to get my attention and be acted on sooner.  Perhaps the fact that I have two 18 girls at home and the phone rings non stop, has affected me.

By the way, I am NOT a teacher of young people but I agree with Patricia Denney, it seems like SD should have said gone not went.
I think it is important to point out whether you email or use any other sort of written correspondence in business it enables you a paper trail.  Whereas, I could have a phone conversation with an individual where important things are discussed but later if something were to go wrong it comes down to finger pointing unlike having everything in writing and dated.
I believe this to be a case of form following function.   Email, phone and face to face communication are all usefull.  I am a grad student and often work late, but few people enjoy getting a phone call at 3 am.  Thus email allows me to send important communications at the moment of inspiration.  However when trying to understaend a complex problem nothing is quite as effective as face to face communication (especially if there is a white board handy).    
SD from Port Orange definitely made a major grammar blunder in saying "The big problems in writing have went from...". I hope s/he is not a teacher of English. "Have went" should be "have gone".

I'm one of the people who prefers communicating by email, but I do also regularly speak to my friends and family on the phone. I also love hand-writing little notes to people, and sending them by regular mail. I rarely get notes or letters in the mail any more, but when I do, it really brightens my day. I enjoy giving that same lift to people I care about -- a little surprise among all the bills in the mail.
I love it! I have set phone appointments with people I usually e-mail in the past few weeks, and just to know that they would take the time out of their day to take a call from me meant so much. And to hear their voice and the personality and passion behind their thoughts was so refreshing.
I Recently had a interview with a major retail store,At the closing of interview the manager said they would contact me by e-mail for the next process.I was very busy at work and failed to answer my phone for a new tel. number that I did not recognize.Little did I know It was the company I had the interview with contacting me with job offer; instead of using e-mail,Making me feel very STUPID!
There is nothing worse than three people watching one constantly work to prepare Breakfast & Lunch; My Non-Working Supervisor constantly stands and look's up junk on computer at register making comments on such all day long! Which makes him very STUPID!
hehe...
I recently received notification of a close friend's death via email. I sat there, in my office, with tears welling up in my eyes, feeling helpless.  The computer couldn't reach out to me and comfort me, answer all my questions about this unexpected event.  My colleagues were looking on, not comprehending the heaviness of the information I had just been given.  Certain things just can't be communicated via email. PERIOD.
Damn, you people are dumb.
Mary of Lexington:

I'm sorry to hear about your loss.  For me, the oppostite was true--when I learned of my mother's death, it came over the phone.  I neither had the clarity to ask a lot of questions, nor did the caller have a lot of time to spend with me on the phone (there were other family members yet to call).  In the next few hours, there was much misinformation due to short phone conversations, where each of us did not hear clearly some of the details regarding the situation.

A few years earlier, I learned, via email, that a dear friend had died.  Yes, I, too, was shaken, but I much preferred learning that way.  The message included details that answered my questions (where, when, the general circumstances), and gave me the option of calling for more information.  I opted not to call, since I knew the sender was dealing with gried just as was I.  I sent a quick message, extending my condolences and thanking him for the information.  In my message, I shared why this friend was so special to me.  Yes, my coworkers could tell something was going on, and I told them, plainly, that I just learned that I lost a good friend.  They would have heard my groan and soft sobs whether I learned via phone or via email, but for me, email was a better way to learn of my friend's passing.
I love the Sunday morning show (Your Business on MSNBC) program – Smart, to the point, well thought out.

BUT – Why in the world would you showcase the plight of returning (reserve) Iraq Vets by interviewing the ONE MAN who single-handedly labeled all of the returning Viet Nam Vets as “Baby Killers”.….. all based on hearsay.

This man was personally responsible for breaking the spirit, confidence and futures of more deserving Veterans than any man in American history.


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